Questions and Answers
| Q. Why did God create Adam before he created Eve? A. Because He didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam. Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man? A. "How do you breath through something so small?" Q. How do you make your girlfriend scream while having sex? A. Call and tell her. Q. A man noticed that his credit card had been stolen but didn't report it. A. The thief was spending less then his wife. Q. Why do men die before their wives? A. They want to. Q. How do men sort out their laundry? A. Filthy, and filthy but wearable. Q. What's the difference between a man and ET? A. ET phoned home. Q. Why haven't they sent a woman to the moon yet? A. It doesn't need cleaning. Q. I married Miss Right. A. I just didn't know her first name was "Always." Q. Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women? A. When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there. Q. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women? A. He died laughing before he could tell anybody. Q. What's the difference between Mad Cow disease and PMS? A. Nothing. Q: What do you do with 365 used rubbers? A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear. Q. What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man? A. Bachelor comes home, sees what's in the refrigerator, goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what's in the bed, and goes to the refrigerator. Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg? A. They don't stop for directions. Q. Why can't women read maps? A. Because only the male mind can comprehend the concept of 1 inch equals a mile. Q. What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman? A. Sexual harassment. Q. What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man? A. $3.99 a minute. Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the future? A. He buys 2 cases of beer instead of one. Q. How do you make holy water? A. Take regular tap water and boil the hell out of it . Q: How many times does 59 go into 21? A: I dunno, ask Woody Allen. |
